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[rebelledforyou]

His head had been at a permanent tilt ever since he turned her television on. He wasn't entirely sure what he was watching. He had somehow lost track of the remote in his couch shuffling and he was stuck with it. There was a woman who was crying and the man was crying as well. If this was a romance movie, it was incredibly poor quality. He had always been under the impression that romance was supposed to be happy. None of that looked happy. Why was the man crying though? Was he allowed to cry? He had hurt the woman and yet he was cupping his face and balling into his hands. Tragic.

Rose was somewhere in the apartment, but he was too consumed with this story to find her. He'd occasionally call upon her when he didn't completely understand what was happening. He tried to use his knowledge from his time with the Winchester's and his time with Rose to piece this movie together.

This couch and this television had become his closest set of friends since everything. He was recovering and trying to still grasp a human lifestyle. It was one thing to exist, but he had to learn how they did things down here. He was trying to busy himself with all these things in a futile effort to push the oncoming storm to the back of his mind. He knew it was coming. It was just a matter of when it'd arrive.

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[second-son83.livejournal.com]

The younger Winchester gave Dean a dirty look as his big brother started pounding on the door. "Dean... Seriously?" The walls looked thin in this place and the last thing they needed was nosy neighbors, especially if this whole trip turned south.

Well, this wasn't what he expected the girl to look like. But the voice did match and she knew their names so... Maybe they did have the right place. But he still didn't move from the front door. But then a voice. That voice. That horribly gruff voice and there he was. Sam's mouth fell open a bit as he caught sight of the angel.

[fallen-hunter79.livejournal.com]

This was a very stressful situation, but Dean could still take a moment to appreciate the young lady that opened the door, if for nothing else than the fact that she was far more attractive than what he had seen so far of her fellow English women.

All else faded though when he heard the voice he thought he'd never hear again. He had spent any part of the plane ride when he was not frozen in terror thinking about what to say when he saw Cas again, sadly all that just flew out of the window.

And then Cas spoke to them.

"You found me?" He pushed passed the attractive blond and stalked over to Cas. All the frustration and hurt he'd experienced told the other man went into one single punch to his jaw, not enough to knock him out but enough to get his point across. "You died, got taken over by that thing and left us to clean up your mess, then just come back and never call and all we get is 'you found me'?"

[huffpuffblonde.livejournal.com]

She'd... seriously been hoping there wouldn't be any punching, but ultimately, at Castiel's insistence, she came to accept it as a likely possibility. She shut the door behind her, watched warily as Dean stalked forward, and winced on his behalf at the punch to the jaw. He got one hit, and if it happened again, she'd slap him.

She furrowed her brow, glanced over at Sam, and gave him a tiny wave. Pursed her lips. This was more of a Dean-Castiel moment, and she wisely kept her mouth shut for once.

[rebelledforyou.livejournal.com]

Sam was slack jawed and Dean just looked mad. He knew that look. He had seen it on multiple occasions. He was angry. He made no attempt to hide that anger either. Then again Sam knew the man was angry and Castiel had told Rose that Dean would probably be very upset. He had betrayed the man in the worst possible way. One of those ways who was very vertical and did not look that bad even though Castiel had busted the wall in his head. Curious.

He didn't have time to contemplate it long because Dean was moving and quickly. He didn't have time to brace for the hit and boy did that hurt. He wasn't prepared to be hit like that. Most of the times Dean had struck him he had been connected to Heaven. It didn't hurt. This was like someone swinging a bat into the side of his face. Maybe it was just the fact that he hadn't been hit properly in this condition ever.

"Dean." He muttered into his hand as he held his face. He wasn't going to argue because Dean had every right to argue. All he could do was straighten up and drop his hand to his side. His lip was bleeding and he really hoped Dean wasn't going to hit him again.

What did one say to someone after something like this? I'm sorry just didn't seem like it would cut it. He sighed heavily and nodded. "I know."

[second-son83.livejournal.com]

Right now Sam wasn't thinking about how Cas broke his mind and let the Leviathans loose. Right now he was just worried about how the man was gonna handle a punch like that. Sam had been on the receiving end on many of those punches and some of those had knocked him out cold. So when Cas just stood there and took it, he was amazed the angel turned human didn't fall to the floor unconscious.

He stepped into the room and gave the woman a short smile in return, looking back to his very, very pissed off brother. He was gonna say something, try to calm Dean down but... his head had enough problems and he really didn't want a concussion. That and yeah... maybe Cas did deserve a punch to the face... or a couple. But he'd let Dean handle that. After all... he did kinda stab Cas in the back when the angel took in Purgatory.

[fallen-hunter79.livejournal.com]

"You know? Oh well in that case we're fine," he gave Cas a tight smile that never reached his eyes. "How could....how could you not say anything? That thing you left out has been terrorizing people and instead of helping you're watching romantic comedies on some chick's couch?"

He raised his fist to hit again, cause wow did he really really want to, but just let it fall and turned away from Cas as he tried his best to get himself to calm down.

[huffpuffblonde.livejournal.com]

Right, he was raising his fist again, maybe... maybe it was time to step in. She moved forward, quietly stepping in between Dean and Cas. She pressed her hand gently to Castiel's shoulder, gave him a concerned glance, and then turned to appeal to the Americans in her doorway.

"Sorry, but he's been a bit... well, just that he's sort of convinced you'd never want to hear from him again. He's... a bit convinced that he's a terrible person. I think maybe he thought you'd hate him, felt happier without him." And probably thought they absolutely deserved to hate him. Maybe they did. Rose didn't want to believe they did. "And- uh- it's Rose, by the way."

[rebelledforyou.livejournal.com]

The Levithans took over. Castiel had been dead. They had torn his vessel apart. If they could overwhelm an angel what good would Castiel as a human do? He was not trained like Dean and Sam were. Would he not just get in the way? Wouldn't he become just another target for the Levithans? An easy kill.

Before he could answer him though Rose had stepped in. Everything she said was true. How could he not think himself a terrible person after everything he had did? He was still baffled as to why God brought him back after all of that. Why was God taking pity on him? His Father never should have forgave him.

"I--I let you down. I let you both down." He stepped forward and moved past Rose. He squared his shoulders in case Dean wanted to hit him again. "I let the power consume me. I thought--I thought I was helping these people. In reality all I did was alienate myself from my--" Dean had said it once. He had claimed it to be true and at the time Castiel brushed him off. "family. What I did was unforgivable." He looked at Sam. He had really wronged him. His gaze shifted back to Dean. "I assumed it was best that I stay away." He swallowed a lump. "Besides what good could I do now, Dean? I'm human. I have no connection to the Heavens anymore."

[second-son83.livejournal.com]

If Dean had gone for another punch Sam would have stepped in but as the hand fell, the younger brother let out a breath. The woman, Rose, shouldn't have stepped in though. As much as he thanked her for helping Cas, this really wasn't her place to get involved. But as long as Dean didn't take a swing at her, which he really doubted would happen, they'd be alright. But it was what Cas said next that confused and bewildered him.

Sam understood the whole 'letting the power consume you' thing. Oh, did he understand that. Sam squared his shoulders and stood up straighter when Cas locked his. Wronged was the wrong word. More like violated. Destroyed. Torn apart. Yeah... Those words sounded better. And wait a second...

"You could help us fix your mess, Cas. I'm sure you have some information that could help us. And not even that... Do you have any idea how much it hurt to have you gone?" Yeah he was talking about himself but he was really talking about Dean. Dean's drinking had nearly tripled since Castiel died.

[fallen-hunter79.livejournal.com]

He managed a side look to Rose, realizing he and Sam probably looked like raving psychos just barging into her home like this. He'd have to apologize later, none of this was about her, she didn't need to get in the middle of it.

And then something Cas said brought him rocketing back to the present. "Only human? Sam and I are only human...so that means we should throw in the towel? Let the world end?"

[huffpuffblonde.livejournal.com]

They looked less like raving psychos than he thought, probably, considering the story Castiel told her. She knew about most of what happened, and it was... it was really, really awful. Sam was right, though. It wasn't her place to step in, so now that things had deescalated from punching, she moved back, out of the way, stepped into the kitchen to put the tea on- and a second later, some coffee as well. Damn Americans and their love of coffee. After the fight was over, they could sit down and just... talk, reasonably, over some food.

[rebelledforyou.livejournal.com]

The pain of losing someone was a foreign concept to Castiel. Well, maybe not entirely, but before it had been easier to deal with. Losing a brother or a sister in battle was a challenge, but it never really crippled the angel before. It never broke him down in any way. Perhaps he had failed to see what his absence could do to the Winchester's. He was possibly naive.

He did watch Rose leave and retreat into the kitchen. His gaze flickered back to Dean. "You and Sam don't need a connection to Heaven. I've--" He let out a sigh. Honesty. "I've never been without it for this long. Before was very different. I do not feel I will come back from this."

He was not trained for that life. He did not know how to function within it without his powers. He did not know his place. He did not feel he even had one anymore. Sam did have a point before though. He should have cleaned up his mess. "My knowledge of them is very limited, but I will assist in any information related capacity you require."

[second-son83.livejournal.com]

His eyes followed the woman's movements, listening to her move around in the kitchen. She didn't seem like a threat so he only kept one ear out for her.

Sam just didn't even know what to do or say so he just stayed quiet, running a hand over his face. Dean usually was the one to talk to Cas about things but Sam knew, in a basic sense, how the angel felt. Cas felt useless and like it would have been better if he stayed out of it.

That's how Sam felt when he and Dean split after War. Sam couldn't trust himself around hunting so he tried to call it quits. But nobody ever gets to call it quits, fallen angel or not. He let out a breath and shifted on his feet. The younger Winchester really didn't know what the hell to do about this. He'd just let Dean handle this. His brother spoke angel better than he did. Or so he thought.